Reflections on motherhood
Apr. 28th, 2022 08:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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<a href"https://www.thecut.com/2022/04/excerpt-ill-show-myself-out-jessi-klein.html">This article was circulating amongst my Mother's group</a>
It starts off with a thought brought about by the author of Eat Pray Love which I think I've reviewed before but can't find it. In essence though, my friend group viewed that book as a whiny piece of literature by an upstart pretentious white privilege woman who needed to get over herself. However after trying to read the next book together: 50 shades of grey- we all agreed that the pretentious upstart (Sarah Gilbert ... sorry love I'm about to elevate you in the next sentence promise) had written a book that was well-written and compelling enough to finish (albeit at times a drag full of self entitled prose).
I don't find playing with Wendy at all mind numbing. Isn't just so fascinating to see her little face light up in curiosity as I bang some dumb toy with the nail file I've been using to prevent her from clawing out her face, and also, clawing at my breasts.
I do find trying to find time to pump out EBM in-between feeds a mind numbing experience. Double pumping both breasts for 10 mins at the same time is a time saver but it's also boring : my entire 10mins has to be fully focused on exactly one task, and one task only: otherwise there is a high risk the milk spills and my efforts are wasted. When one could spend time doing other things I'd be glued to the kitchen floor, staring at this little machine and also trying to do single handed breast massage whilst also keeping hold of the suction cups...
That's pretty mind numbing.
I don't know if it's a hero task. It buys me some freedom incase I need to go somewhere at the last min and can't take Wendy with me nor have time to pump exactly on the spot. - or if I'm to be late home, well, there's a stash ready to go and I don't need to rush back for fear she's sitting there hungry.
So, it's more of a guilty pleasure stash that serves me and myself mostly.
Perhaps I'll feel differently as she gets older, weans off and becomes demanding in other ways. Currently she just appears completely helpless and dependent on the boob.
It starts off with a thought brought about by the author of Eat Pray Love which I think I've reviewed before but can't find it. In essence though, my friend group viewed that book as a whiny piece of literature by an upstart pretentious white privilege woman who needed to get over herself. However after trying to read the next book together: 50 shades of grey- we all agreed that the pretentious upstart (Sarah Gilbert ... sorry love I'm about to elevate you in the next sentence promise) had written a book that was well-written and compelling enough to finish (albeit at times a drag full of self entitled prose).
I don't find playing with Wendy at all mind numbing. Isn't just so fascinating to see her little face light up in curiosity as I bang some dumb toy with the nail file I've been using to prevent her from clawing out her face, and also, clawing at my breasts.
I do find trying to find time to pump out EBM in-between feeds a mind numbing experience. Double pumping both breasts for 10 mins at the same time is a time saver but it's also boring : my entire 10mins has to be fully focused on exactly one task, and one task only: otherwise there is a high risk the milk spills and my efforts are wasted. When one could spend time doing other things I'd be glued to the kitchen floor, staring at this little machine and also trying to do single handed breast massage whilst also keeping hold of the suction cups...
That's pretty mind numbing.
I don't know if it's a hero task. It buys me some freedom incase I need to go somewhere at the last min and can't take Wendy with me nor have time to pump exactly on the spot. - or if I'm to be late home, well, there's a stash ready to go and I don't need to rush back for fear she's sitting there hungry.
So, it's more of a guilty pleasure stash that serves me and myself mostly.
Perhaps I'll feel differently as she gets older, weans off and becomes demanding in other ways. Currently she just appears completely helpless and dependent on the boob.
